i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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