adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
