apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Randomize
