I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
