I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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