Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The adults are the big ones right?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
