Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
