I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
