That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
