Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
