Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
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We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
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I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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