the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize