Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
