1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
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