i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize