One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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