You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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