It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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