I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
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