Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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