Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
