youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize