i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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