I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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