if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
