She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Holy shit dude........stairs
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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