hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
