Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
