Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
so much tequila, so little girl.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
