I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
