Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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