Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
