I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
