I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
