I am in a vortex of obligation.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
