I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize