just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
