if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
