we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize