At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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