If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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