I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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