Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
