he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
it glows. i had to have it.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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