I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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