a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
