I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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