I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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