Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
