What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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