I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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